Kenya Bound

It's the leaving that is so hard. I don't know how many tears I have shed just thinking about leaving, and now the day has arrived.

I tossed and turned too much last night to have gotten any rest. I have second guessed my decision to leave because of all of the fears that I have. All of my fears have to do with Scott and Ella Beth and Landon. Will they be safe? What if something happens while I'm gone? I want so badly to push these thoughts aside because I know they are from Satan. But it's hard.

I cling to 2 Timothy 1:7 "For the Lord has not given us a spirit of fear, but of love, power, and sound mind." I reminded Satan over and over again that he does not have the power over me to drive me crazy - unless I give it to him. And, it's been hard not to. When those fearful thoughts come up of the "what ifs" while I'm away, I can easily allow myself to go crazy.

But I stop and pray. And I simply must choose to give my children over to the One who made them, who loves them, and who has already directed their paths.

It's hard because I love them so. And I hate to say bye-bye.

I ask that as often as you think of me being gone or think of Scott and the kiddos that you would take a minute to pray for them. Please pray hard for their safety and their health. Please pray for Scott's work schedule that it won't be difficult while I am away (but that he will still have work to bring in the money that we need). Please pray for Ella Beth who is already having a hard time and I have not left yet. Today is going to be especially difficult because she knows that I am leaving the family this evening. There will be many tears shed by both of us, and it is going to be so hard to pry her arms away as I have to turn and leave. And I hate that.

But I know that God is in this. And I am Kenya bound.

Thank you, friends.